Yet another accused rapist and yet another underhanded victim-blaming headline.

This time it’s the Courier Mail erasing the alleged victim and replacing him with the app on which he met his alleged rapist. This is the new “drunk woman/gay man” headline trope that signals readers to blame the victim rather than the man accused of raping them.

Google “Tinder Rapist” and you’ll find hundreds of thousands of headlines, all designed to let you know the victim was a woman actively seeking a partner (possibly for sex!!) rather than passively waiting for a man to choose her. Modern slut shaming under a thin veneer of concern about the dangers of dating apps.

Dating apps are not dangerous. Rapists are dangerous and they are dangerous no matter where you meet them.

“Grindr Rapist” is the same shit in a different bucket – playing to the myth that gay men are degenerate and promiscuous and therefore to blame for any violence someone chooses to commit against them.

I shouldn’t need to say this but I do because those myths still flourish – being gay has nothing to do with how much care and respect you have for consent. That care and respect is entirely about what kind of human you are, it has nothing to do with your sexuality or gender.

Any headline you see where violence is tied to an app not a person, remind yourself (and everyone else) that victim blaming has not disappeared, it’s just wearing a new costume.


If you’re reading this on social media, links to all the articles are on the post on my website:

FixedIt is an ongoing project to push back against the media’s constant erasure of violent men and blaming of innocent victims. If you would like to help fund it – even $5 a month makes a big difference – please consider becoming a Patron

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